Grammy Day

Today was Grammy Day; the day I am supposed to do cool things with my kids that remind me of her and talk to my kiddos about her. Instead it was slacker day and I feel rather guilty. Nick went hunting with his dad and it was rainy and I apparently forgot how to read a calendar, so me and the kiddos ended up playing in our jammies after a feast of whole wheat chocolate chip pancakes. Now that I think about it, that was something Grammy would have loved (the chocolate breakfast, not the jammies for way too much of the day).

We did rally and have our friends over for lunch but, I didn't even provide them with the fun fall napkins in my drawer to go with our cozy soup and grilled cheese. phooey.

This evening I made the No Bake cookies that Grammy used to make, and especially used to make and send to me at college in much-loved care packages. While stirring and watching the chocolate boil, I had a few minutes to think solely of Grammy and I think that will have to do for this year. I miss her. I miss telling her stories about my silly Sydney girl. She would have giggled and giggled at Sydney painting her ENTIRE room with finger paints instead of napping yesterday and that would have taken some of the sting of the mess off.

I made fabric flowers for Grammy Day last year, but I found this tutorial that is seriously tempting me to make some more for her. She was so proud of my crafty side and I wish I could send her a bouquet of fabric flowers today.

As I was leaving Sydney's room this evening, she called out, "Mom? You made special chocolate chip cookies?" And I realized I had skimmed over the most important part of Grammy Day--talking to my kids about her. So, I snuggled up in Sydney's bed and explained that I'd made the cookies special for Grammy because she made them for me when I was a little girl and a big girl and today is the day that two years ago Grammy went to be with Jesus. Sydney reported that she was a big girl and that "My dog, Phoebe went to be with Jesus too!" She then worried that Phoebe might bark at Grammy and Grammy wouldn't like it. I said that Phoebe didn't usually bark too much, only when she got excited, so maybe she was just excited to go for a walk with Grammy and Jesus. This seemed to satisfy both of us, except that Sydney had to explain that I had made the cookies for her and me and Daddy to eat, not Buddy and not Grammy and Phoebe.

So, it wasn't the best showing at our house for Grammy Day, but in the end I think I got to the important part, which was remembering her and missing her and passing on a little bit of her to my kids, even if it was just in the form of a gooey chocolatey cookie and the remembrance of her thoughtful, seasonal gifts.